Title of Tutorial

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By issuing the sac -nar command, your spirit animal will be changed to the narwhal.

10 PRINT "DO YOU EAT BOOGERS?"
20 INPUT X
30 IF X="YES" THEN PRINT "YOU'RE A GOOD MAN, CHARLIE BROWN.": END
40 IF X="NO" THEN PRINT "WHAT, YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME?"

$ finger man@arms
Login: man                                 Name: Duncan
Directory: /eternia/heroic_warriors/man    Shell: /bin/bashasaurus
No mail.
Plan: Make Orko clean-up the mess he left in my workshop.

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Do not forget to flush the buffer. If you do, the smell will be intolerable.

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The Honeywell 6080 can be induced to perform a samba by pressing the button labeled "Samba" on the operator's console¹. That mainframe's forté, however, is the foxtrot(2), but the inducement of that particular step is beyond the scope of this tutorial.

Notes

1. Zurgone Vemliat, Mainframe Dancing Habits (Milwaukie: Brewers' Press, 1988), 96.
2. Vemliat, Mainframe, 112.